I was walking from my office to PATH station. Big evening crowd. Suddenly, the lady before me says 'what the fuck'. I saw what had just happened. The asshole who had just passed me had just pressed the lady's breast in broad sunlight. I pause a little bit to see the slap that was coming. Then she turns to her friend and says
'I can't beleive he did that. I mean...why he had to do that. All he had to do was ask me out. Did you see him...he was so gorgeous'
Holy crap....wtf is happening here...he just mollested her in the middle of 6th Ave and she was letting him go. I thought I know something about girls...I give up...they are one complicated bunch
Aftr this, I keep walking to the station thinking how bizzare the whole thing was.
After reaching the station what do you think I see. Take a guess. I see a lady wrapped in a small towel...a pretty one too...no...not the towel...the lady...the lady was pretty
She was standing inside the train wrapped in a small towel...like she just finished her bath and relaxing in her bedroom....but the real shocker was the passengers...no one seemed to care or excited....Come on...how many times you have seen a lady in a train in a towel...
Am I seeing things...I think I am going crazy...NYC is one fucked up city
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Friday, June 15, 2007
A revolution is coming
(Nothing serious...just a funny attempt...I don't condone anything I am saying in this post and I am against all those things said in the picture)
I have some real bad disturbing news for my 'Brothers of Manhood'. It will definitely be traumatizing. So, if you have any heart problems, please stop reading. Ignorance is bliss.
I have proof that we are being cheated, used, violated and robbed of our freedom and basic rights by our female counterparts (or should I say 'Witches of the Sisterhood').
Last week, I was send a highly confidential package that contained some very disturbing documents. That document came into existence 52 years ago. To be exact, it was a copy of the Magazine called as 'Housekeeping Monthly' dated 13th May 1955. Please read the attachment below to understand the gross injustice that has been practiced by our beautiful female counterparts on us for the better part of last two decades.
Click on the picture below to read its contents. Its very important you read the underlined lines in the picture below
Brothers, its time to get back what is ours. What is lost can be reclaimed. It is not too late. Join with me to reclaim our Glory. I will give you the freedom our ancestors enjoyed 50 years ago.
But, BEWARE....the opposition is know for its totalitarian and fascistic approach. They will try miniskirts to derail us. Tight T-shirts and tiny weeny itsy bitsy shorts will be used as weapons of slavery. Tank tops and tight jeans will be weared just to floor us. But, remember my friends...we are already on the floor. Any further below, we will get buried alive.
But, my friends, those weapons do not scare me. I am afraid of something more sinister. Its so evil to the level that we can't imagine. I am informed that our female Nazi's have a super secret weapon. Its a lethal combination of saree, Jasmine flower and homely look. Anyone wearing any of these should not be trusted but viewed with serious distrust.
I understand that its not easy to escape the cunning traps described above. In those trying situations think about the things we can enjoy if we succeed in this holy war. I have mentioned a few below. Please go ahead and read them.
In 1955, according to that magazine,
these are just a few of the benefits....hundreds will follow....
P.S: Nope...Iam not a male chauvenistic pig....but I just can't stop imagining about life during year 1955. Man....those guys had it easy...In 1955, I can sit at home watching Sunday Afternoon Football with a Beer in my hand. Damn...where is my farking Time Machine
I have some real bad disturbing news for my 'Brothers of Manhood'. It will definitely be traumatizing. So, if you have any heart problems, please stop reading. Ignorance is bliss.
I have proof that we are being cheated, used, violated and robbed of our freedom and basic rights by our female counterparts (or should I say 'Witches of the Sisterhood').
Last week, I was send a highly confidential package that contained some very disturbing documents. That document came into existence 52 years ago. To be exact, it was a copy of the Magazine called as 'Housekeeping Monthly' dated 13th May 1955. Please read the attachment below to understand the gross injustice that has been practiced by our beautiful female counterparts on us for the better part of last two decades.
Click on the picture below to read its contents. Its very important you read the underlined lines in the picture below
Brothers, its time to get back what is ours. What is lost can be reclaimed. It is not too late. Join with me to reclaim our Glory. I will give you the freedom our ancestors enjoyed 50 years ago.
But, BEWARE....the opposition is know for its totalitarian and fascistic approach. They will try miniskirts to derail us. Tight T-shirts and tiny weeny itsy bitsy shorts will be used as weapons of slavery. Tank tops and tight jeans will be weared just to floor us. But, remember my friends...we are already on the floor. Any further below, we will get buried alive.
But, my friends, those weapons do not scare me. I am afraid of something more sinister. Its so evil to the level that we can't imagine. I am informed that our female Nazi's have a super secret weapon. Its a lethal combination of saree, Jasmine flower and homely look. Anyone wearing any of these should not be trusted but viewed with serious distrust.
I understand that its not easy to escape the cunning traps described above. In those trying situations think about the things we can enjoy if we succeed in this holy war. I have mentioned a few below. Please go ahead and read them.
In 1955, according to that magazine,
- a women had no right to question her man.
- can't question him if he comes late at night
- has to provide him with drinks after work....heineken baby
these are just a few of the benefits....hundreds will follow....
P.S: Nope...Iam not a male chauvenistic pig....but I just can't stop imagining about life during year 1955. Man....those guys had it easy...In 1955, I can sit at home watching Sunday Afternoon Football with a Beer in my hand. Damn...where is my farking Time Machine
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Pennsylvennia Sucks
Pennsylvenia DMV says "Driving is not your right...its a Privilege". WTF....last time I checked this was a free country and Hitler was killed long ago. Iam telling you...these guys are Grade A douche bags.
Last weekend, went to Atlantic City for a nice weekend of Poker and Blackjack. Had a room booked in Tropicana. Rented a Mustang. Everything fine till my foot became a little heavy and started punching that Mustang at high speeds. I don't know about you guys. For me, pumping a sports car and melting the asphalt in a curvy road is way better than Sex. Now, no innocent questions like 'Sir, do you get an orgasm while u drive?'. This is a PG rated Blog ;) (Due to Sat's not so innocent comments....i want to mention that I don't have any practical experience in the above mentioned analogy....not b'cos I didn't have any offers...just b'cos I am a pakka tamilan. LMAO)
It was a 55 mph zone and I was going at 110 mph. I mean...it was a Friday night. What looser is going to hide under a bridge holding a radar. Wrong...big mistake.
For all those people who are thinking ..."Big Deal...so you got a ticket for speeding 50 miles above speed limit...the max you get is 1 month suspension and a reckless driving charge....cry me a river ahole", please look below.
Driving Record of Wyvern for the last 7 months - The cutest Dragon (From now on please call me by this name)
Wait a minute for 5 minutes...there are more side effect charges
Now you know why Penn DMV says ""Driving is not your right...its a Privilege" and why they are freaking right.
Its because of idiots like me.
P.S: I don't know why...but I am mighty proud of my driving record....this is a thar perumai post....yup...iam a shameless narcisstic pig rolling in self vanity
Last weekend, went to Atlantic City for a nice weekend of Poker and Blackjack. Had a room booked in Tropicana. Rented a Mustang. Everything fine till my foot became a little heavy and started punching that Mustang at high speeds. I don't know about you guys. For me, pumping a sports car and melting the asphalt in a curvy road is way better than Sex. Now, no innocent questions like 'Sir, do you get an orgasm while u drive?'. This is a PG rated Blog ;) (Due to Sat's not so innocent comments....i want to mention that I don't have any practical experience in the above mentioned analogy....not b'cos I didn't have any offers...just b'cos I am a pakka tamilan. LMAO)
It was a 55 mph zone and I was going at 110 mph. I mean...it was a Friday night. What looser is going to hide under a bridge holding a radar. Wrong...big mistake.
For all those people who are thinking ..."Big Deal...so you got a ticket for speeding 50 miles above speed limit...the max you get is 1 month suspension and a reckless driving charge....cry me a river ahole", please look below.
Driving Record of Wyvern for the last 7 months - The cutest Dragon (From now on please call me by this name)
| Crime | Date | Fine |
| Speeding: 105 mph on 55 mph | June 1st 2007 | $228 |
| Speeding: 75 mph on 65 mph | May 4th 2007 | $135 |
| No Inspection | Sometime May 07 | $75 |
| Caught Driving on suspended License | Feb 2007 | $280 + License Suspended for 1 more year |
| Disregarding Lanes causing Accident (just ask Adia at kadalamittai.blogspot on his life threatening experience) | Feb 2007 | $75 |
| No registration | Feb 2007 | $75 |
| Disregarding a Citation | Jan 2007 | $300 |
| Caught Driving on suspended License | Dec 2006 | $280 + License Suspended for 1 year |
| Disregarding a Citation | Nov 2006 | License Suspended for 20 days |
| Speeding: 59 mph on a 35 | Oct 2006 | $157 |
Wait a minute for 5 minutes...there are more side effect charges
Now you know why Penn DMV says ""Driving is not your right...its a Privilege" and why they are freaking right.
Its because of idiots like me.
P.S: I don't know why...but I am mighty proud of my driving record....this is a thar perumai post....yup...iam a shameless narcisstic pig rolling in self vanity
Friday, May 25, 2007
Feelings of a Tamil Music lover (Not me)
Saw this coment on rediff. Some North Indian gave bad review to Cheeni Kum and others were commenting about Illayaraja - both bad and good
Some Tamilan got offended and gave one of the most coolest praise for Raja...here it goes
Well, I think the music of Ilaiyaraaja itself is a generation, an era. Why? when you are the first Asian to perform at RPO of London, you are an era. When you have scored music for nearly 850 movies (that is almost 4000 songs not to mention the BGMs), you are an era. When The Great Naushad said that you have achieved what we haven't achieved in 100 years, you are an era. When you have the record for the Tamil album (Thiruvasagam) that sold more numbers than any other Tamil album, you are an era. John Williams took seven months to one year to compose music for Saving Private Ryan. When you compose music for the whole movie in weeks possibly in days for Oscar bidding, thats too three movies (Nayagan, Anjali, Hey Ram), you are an era. When you write music for a movie in front of the director and producer in few minutes, may be an hour and the album goes on to become one of the greatest audio hits (Chinna Tambi) ever, you are an era. And despite all these achievements if you weren't awarded any major central government award, you are an era and example of bias in our present day India.
what u think?
Some Tamilan got offended and gave one of the most coolest praise for Raja...here it goes
Well, I think the music of Ilaiyaraaja itself is a generation, an era. Why? when you are the first Asian to perform at RPO of London, you are an era. When you have scored music for nearly 850 movies (that is almost 4000 songs not to mention the BGMs), you are an era. When The Great Naushad said that you have achieved what we haven't achieved in 100 years, you are an era. When you have the record for the Tamil album (Thiruvasagam) that sold more numbers than any other Tamil album, you are an era. John Williams took seven months to one year to compose music for Saving Private Ryan. When you compose music for the whole movie in weeks possibly in days for Oscar bidding, thats too three movies (Nayagan, Anjali, Hey Ram), you are an era. When you write music for a movie in front of the director and producer in few minutes, may be an hour and the album goes on to become one of the greatest audio hits (Chinna Tambi) ever, you are an era. And despite all these achievements if you weren't awarded any major central government award, you are an era and example of bias in our present day India.
what u think?
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Joint Family Chronicles
In these chronicles, you will read about some funny stuff that happens in most joint families.
Incident No: 1
This is similar to the scene in movie 'Anandham' where Abbas calls from Delhi and everyone in the family tries to speak to him.
I think it was 1995-1996. My elder sister joined an Engineering college in Kovai. I still remember the day she left for college. It was like someone died. No one can beat my sister in sympathy dept. She was all smiles while packing her new chudi's. 10 min later when it was time to leave, kannula aruvi kotta arambichuduchu. Athu eppadinga, switch on panna mathiri ala mudiyuthu sila perala. I was the only peson who knew it was an act
During weekend, whole family except me will be waiting for her call. Especially, my mom. She had some wierd ESP power. While the phone is ringing itself she will say ' en ponnu than phone pannura'. Thats it. every one will run for the phone.
My periya chithappa will go like " hello...yaru..kannama'va pesurathu....eppadida iruka chellam....nee illama veeda verichodi pochuda...antha nai than vetti'ya oora suthuikittu eruku" . (enna enga vambuku ilukuranga)
Then my nadu chitapps, will come running, "Yaru ammai'ya phone le" , then rips the phone and starts melting
"Thangam....eppadida eruka....panam ellam irukada...innoru 1000 rupees anupavada....summa vachukada"
ada pavingala...nethu 10 ruba ketathuku antha salambu salabuniga...neramda sami
then he keeps going on and on till my chinna chitaps manages to get the phone and starts his own pasa malai
"chellam...kuttima...nalla erukiyada....mess'le sappadu ellam eppadida iruku...ethavathu venumna solluda...innaku night'a bus pidichu cbe vanthudren."
nanum 2 weeks'a nandu senju thanganu ketkiren....atha pannale....ana ponnukuna matum 8 hrs travel panni vangi kodupingalo....mavane inimel evanathu pengal, sama urimai nu pesina kola than vilum.
Then the head villain takes the phone....enga daddy'ya than solluren.
"eppadida iruka....college'le pasanga yaravathu ragging pannurangala.....bayapadama sollu...nan parthukiren"
amam ivaru periya sandiyaru...antha math vathi enna remba thituranu nalu nala solikittu eruken...avanaiye onnum panna mudiyala...evaru colllleeegu pasangala all vachu adika poraram...
Finally, my sister asks for me. Not cos of pasam...just to show off her power.
"deiii...ennada olunga padika matengiriyame....olukama nadanthuko...un nallathukuthan sollren"
aading....public exam'le bit adichu pass agitu...ennake advice'a....mavale...leaveku nee intha pakkam thane varuva....anniku vachukiren unnai
Someone then slaps my head strongly and rips the phone from my hand and continues their paza malai. All this b'cos my sister was born right after my grandma died and a part of her name is Grandma's name, which to my chagrin is not abitha kusalambal. Two years later, I joined a college and was all excited to make my first phone call away from home. 5 or 6 rings went and no one took the call...finally, my periya chitaps took the call
Him: neeya....enna sollu....ammava kupidava
Me: neenga eppadi erukinga chithappa
Him: deii enna nakkala...vutena sevulu pinjudum...anju nalaiku munnale enna eppadi parthiyo appadiye than eppavum eruken
ivaru velaiku vara mattaru....vera yarai yavathu try pannuvom
Me: nadu chitappah erukangala
Periya C: avan etho velaiya irukanam...ennanu ketka solran
goyale...namaku akka alavuku mariyathai irukathunu theriyum...ana intha mathiri deposit'a irukathunu theriyama pocha
Then my chinna chitaps takes the phone and asks "dei exam ellam vachangalada"
"illa chithappa, eppo than class start agi eruku...exam ellam ennum one month kalichu than"
"olunga padichu mark vangura valiya paru....ange poiyum poruki mathiri oor suthi kittu erunthe....bus eri vanthu methipen rascal"
ennathu...akkavuku matum bus eri vanthu ketkarathe vangi kodupangalam....ana ennai matum methipangalam.
ithuku melayum phone panna nan enna kiruka illa loosa....me the escape da sami
Incident No: 1
This is similar to the scene in movie 'Anandham' where Abbas calls from Delhi and everyone in the family tries to speak to him.
I think it was 1995-1996. My elder sister joined an Engineering college in Kovai. I still remember the day she left for college. It was like someone died. No one can beat my sister in sympathy dept. She was all smiles while packing her new chudi's. 10 min later when it was time to leave, kannula aruvi kotta arambichuduchu. Athu eppadinga, switch on panna mathiri ala mudiyuthu sila perala. I was the only peson who knew it was an act
During weekend, whole family except me will be waiting for her call. Especially, my mom. She had some wierd ESP power. While the phone is ringing itself she will say ' en ponnu than phone pannura'. Thats it. every one will run for the phone.
My periya chithappa will go like " hello...yaru..kannama'va pesurathu....eppadida iruka chellam....nee illama veeda verichodi pochuda...antha nai than vetti'ya oora suthuikittu eruku" . (enna enga vambuku ilukuranga)
Then my nadu chitapps, will come running, "Yaru ammai'ya phone le" , then rips the phone and starts melting
"Thangam....eppadida eruka....panam ellam irukada...innoru 1000 rupees anupavada....summa vachukada"
ada pavingala...nethu 10 ruba ketathuku antha salambu salabuniga...neramda sami
then he keeps going on and on till my chinna chitaps manages to get the phone and starts his own pasa malai
"chellam...kuttima...nalla erukiyada....mess'le sappadu ellam eppadida iruku...ethavathu venumna solluda...innaku night'a bus pidichu cbe vanthudren."
nanum 2 weeks'a nandu senju thanganu ketkiren....atha pannale....ana ponnukuna matum 8 hrs travel panni vangi kodupingalo....mavane inimel evanathu pengal, sama urimai nu pesina kola than vilum.
Then the head villain takes the phone....enga daddy'ya than solluren.
"eppadida iruka....college'le pasanga yaravathu ragging pannurangala.....bayapadama sollu...nan parthukiren"
amam ivaru periya sandiyaru...antha math vathi enna remba thituranu nalu nala solikittu eruken...avanaiye onnum panna mudiyala...evaru colllleeegu pasangala all vachu adika poraram...
Finally, my sister asks for me. Not cos of pasam...just to show off her power.
"deiii...ennada olunga padika matengiriyame....olukama nadanthuko...un nallathukuthan sollren"
aading....public exam'le bit adichu pass agitu...ennake advice'a....mavale...leaveku nee intha pakkam thane varuva....anniku vachukiren unnai
Someone then slaps my head strongly and rips the phone from my hand and continues their paza malai. All this b'cos my sister was born right after my grandma died and a part of her name is Grandma's name, which to my chagrin is not abitha kusalambal. Two years later, I joined a college and was all excited to make my first phone call away from home. 5 or 6 rings went and no one took the call...finally, my periya chitaps took the call
Him: neeya....enna sollu....ammava kupidava
Me: neenga eppadi erukinga chithappa
Him: deii enna nakkala...vutena sevulu pinjudum...anju nalaiku munnale enna eppadi parthiyo appadiye than eppavum eruken
ivaru velaiku vara mattaru....vera yarai yavathu try pannuvom
Me: nadu chitappah erukangala
Periya C: avan etho velaiya irukanam...ennanu ketka solran
goyale...namaku akka alavuku mariyathai irukathunu theriyum...ana intha mathiri deposit'a irukathunu theriyama pocha
Then my chinna chitaps takes the phone and asks "dei exam ellam vachangalada"
"illa chithappa, eppo than class start agi eruku...exam ellam ennum one month kalichu than"
"olunga padichu mark vangura valiya paru....ange poiyum poruki mathiri oor suthi kittu erunthe....bus eri vanthu methipen rascal"
ennathu...akkavuku matum bus eri vanthu ketkarathe vangi kodupangalam....ana ennai matum methipangalam.
ithuku melayum phone panna nan enna kiruka illa loosa....me the escape da sami
Monday, April 23, 2007
Me + Flirting = bulb
This was my first and last flirting attempt.
Mathavanga thunbathula inbam kanrathu unga ellarukum alwa sapidura mathirinu enaku theriyum...so, take your seat and enjoy my appu vangifying show
Okay start Mujic
Song: en soga kathaiyai kelu thaikulame
That forsaken day, I went to Borders to do the obvious; Read new Magazines for free, drink coffee, gwak at girls like they are from Venus. The queue at the counter was huge. Cursing myself, I joined the queue. Suddenly, I look up and there she was. She was in one of the counters.
Now change song to ' Adada brahman buthisali...avanai vida nan athirstasali'
Fabulous, beautiful, angelic, serene, eye-popping, elegant, royal. None of these words does justice to her. I have seen a lot of beauties in my site adichufying career. But this one was different. When she smiles her whole face smiles including her eyes. I could only imagine how she would look when she pouts. She was not any sexily clad model. She is the kind of person who gets respect without demanding, who you take to your mom and introduce. In short, she was perfect.
You have to look into her eyes to understand what I experienced. Her eyes were like a vast sea...not those turbulent sea, but the calm serene sea. Even though I only looked into her eyes for a couple of second, it felt like I had dove into the galactic ether and stayed there forever. She was showing me all the secrecy that no man has ever seen. Believe me, her eyes had a whole new mysterious universe inside.
Couple of times, I asked the person behind me to go forward. You don't have to be an Einstein to know what I was trying to do. Finally, I was called by her.
(Inner Me is my Soul, speaking Truth)
Her: 'I can help the next person in queue' - She looked up and smiled at me.
Inner Me: 'Ava ennai parthu sirichada....athan oore sirichuche'- che, entha nerathule entha dialog en gabakathuku varuthu
Her: How are you doing
Me: Just Great. Absolutely Fantastic. How about you.
Inner Me: dei over'a pesi scene agathe...act cool..act like you have been there before
Her: I am good.Thanks. Weather outside is wonderful. Can't ask for more..right
Inner Me: Weather pathi ellam pesurada...ithuku kandipa 'I would love to enjoy this weather with you' nu than artham....mavane pichutuda....eppadida machi 4 words'leye ponnugalai impress pannura...ennamo poda
Me: Yeah. Can't ask for more
Inner Me: dei..dei...enda ava sonnathaiye repeat panre...talk something intelligent man...say something funny
Giving my book and card and she is ringing the counter.
In a couple of minutes, everything will be over.
Me: Hey...can I ask you something.
Her: (looks up...smiles) sure
Inner Me:Positive sign da machi...ennada ketka pora....theriyalaiye....ethavathu on the spot develop panna vendiyathu than
Me: Is today some kind of a special day for you. Like your birthday.
Inner Me: vachanda appu...she is going to thing you are a creep....serupadi vangarathukulla escape agidu
Her: No. why do you ask - Still smiling
Inner Me: May be not...she is curious...and you are also not that bad looking...you definitely don't look like a creep...proceed with confidence
Me: I noticed you while waiting in the queue. You looked very happy and vibrant. I mean...you were standing here...looking fabulous...all smiles, helping everyone. You don't see that often with people while they work. So, i was thinking...hmmm...may be its her birthday or some other special day
Inner Me: ennum face le eruthu siripu pogale....ratchasi...ethavathu sign koden...pidichu eruka...illaiya...torture pannathedi...ethukellam kalyanathuku appuram nee than kastapaduva
Her: Nooooo. Its not my birthday
Inner Me: 'No' kuda evvalavu alaga cute'a solra paru. Neeyum erukiye..kottika mattum than theriyun unnaku
Me: Are you sure. I mean..from there your face was glowing like a Christmas candle. I could almost see the halo behind you.. This is important. please think carefully. Are you really sure this is not an important day? If not, I have to assume you had a big fight with the man upstairs and came to earth to cool off.
Her: (Laughing...not just a small laugh..but a hearty friendly laugh) Please...you are making me Blush
Inner Me: MY GOD..how can someone beautiful like her can get more beautiful...God ain't fair Wyvern
Inner Me: So you are trying to say she is an angel. Well every dog had used that line before. But, considering your background...you did good for a Rookie
Her:(Still laughing) Nooo...definitely not. May be b'cos I got married couple of days back
Inner Me: WHATTTT....what did you just say...machi did I really hear what I just heard. kaduvule...thalai ellam suthuthe. okay...okay. you can mourn this later...people are watching you...first essagu.
Change Song to "silar siripar silar aluvar silar sirithikondei alugindrar"
Me: (Me full of smiles) Oh..really..thats good news. Congratulations.
Inner Me: Sivaji kamal yellam poi periya actor nu solranga...machi unnai mattum ippo Cheran parthan...avanoda aduthu senti padathuku nee than hero
Her: Thanks (still smiling)
Me: Just tell your husband, He is the luckiest man in the world
Inner Me: avan thanni lorri mothi saganum...even better...avan methu oru semi eri kollanum. samayapuram atha...nee matum ithai enaku pannu...unaku gold'le vepa elai seyren)
Her: (smiling...)He already knows that
Inner Me:But he doesn't know about my wish to our powerful samayapuram atha..(Inner me dancing like Vivek...hey ajaku...hey ajaku...hey ajaku)
Me and Inner Me....going out sadly
Song: Sothanai mel sothanai pothumada sami
Me: valkaiyela bulb'u erukalam...ana valkaiye bulb'a irunthuchuna
Inner Me: Machi, nanga appu vangina appu kadavul un kitta varalam...ana appu kadavule appu thanga mudiyama kalangina....nanga yar kittada povom kasmalam
The only good thing about this colossal bulb is that she didn't think I was a psycho. May be a Loser.. I think she realized I was speaking from my heart. But again, who knows for sure what in the hell these girls think. Not me
Mathavanga thunbathula inbam kanrathu unga ellarukum alwa sapidura mathirinu enaku theriyum...so, take your seat and enjoy my appu vangifying show
Okay start Mujic
Song: en soga kathaiyai kelu thaikulame
That forsaken day, I went to Borders to do the obvious; Read new Magazines for free, drink coffee, gwak at girls like they are from Venus. The queue at the counter was huge. Cursing myself, I joined the queue. Suddenly, I look up and there she was. She was in one of the counters.
Now change song to ' Adada brahman buthisali...avanai vida nan athirstasali'
Fabulous, beautiful, angelic, serene, eye-popping, elegant, royal. None of these words does justice to her. I have seen a lot of beauties in my site adichufying career. But this one was different. When she smiles her whole face smiles including her eyes. I could only imagine how she would look when she pouts. She was not any sexily clad model. She is the kind of person who gets respect without demanding, who you take to your mom and introduce. In short, she was perfect.
You have to look into her eyes to understand what I experienced. Her eyes were like a vast sea...not those turbulent sea, but the calm serene sea. Even though I only looked into her eyes for a couple of second, it felt like I had dove into the galactic ether and stayed there forever. She was showing me all the secrecy that no man has ever seen. Believe me, her eyes had a whole new mysterious universe inside.
Couple of times, I asked the person behind me to go forward. You don't have to be an Einstein to know what I was trying to do. Finally, I was called by her.
(Inner Me is my Soul, speaking Truth)
Her: 'I can help the next person in queue' - She looked up and smiled at me.
Inner Me: 'Ava ennai parthu sirichada....athan oore sirichuche'- che, entha nerathule entha dialog en gabakathuku varuthu
Her: How are you doing
Me: Just Great. Absolutely Fantastic. How about you.
Inner Me: dei over'a pesi scene agathe...act cool..act like you have been there before
Her: I am good.Thanks. Weather outside is wonderful. Can't ask for more..right
Inner Me: Weather pathi ellam pesurada...ithuku kandipa 'I would love to enjoy this weather with you' nu than artham....mavane pichutuda....eppadida machi 4 words'leye ponnugalai impress pannura...ennamo poda
Me: Yeah. Can't ask for more
Inner Me: dei..dei...enda ava sonnathaiye repeat panre...talk something intelligent man...say something funny
Giving my book and card and she is ringing the counter.
In a couple of minutes, everything will be over.
Me: Hey...can I ask you something.
Her: (looks up...smiles) sure
Inner Me:Positive sign da machi...ennada ketka pora....theriyalaiye....ethavathu on the spot develop panna vendiyathu than
Me: Is today some kind of a special day for you. Like your birthday.
Inner Me: vachanda appu...she is going to thing you are a creep....serupadi vangarathukulla escape agidu
Her: No. why do you ask - Still smiling
Inner Me: May be not...she is curious...and you are also not that bad looking...you definitely don't look like a creep...proceed with confidence
Me: I noticed you while waiting in the queue. You looked very happy and vibrant. I mean...you were standing here...looking fabulous...all smiles, helping everyone. You don't see that often with people while they work. So, i was thinking...hmmm...may be its her birthday or some other special day
Inner Me: ennum face le eruthu siripu pogale....ratchasi...ethavathu sign koden...pidichu eruka...illaiya...torture pannathedi...ethukellam kalyanathuku appuram nee than kastapaduva
Her: Nooooo. Its not my birthday
Inner Me: 'No' kuda evvalavu alaga cute'a solra paru. Neeyum erukiye..kottika mattum than theriyun unnaku
Me: Are you sure. I mean..from there your face was glowing like a Christmas candle. I could almost see the halo behind you.. This is important. please think carefully. Are you really sure this is not an important day? If not, I have to assume you had a big fight with the man upstairs and came to earth to cool off.
Her: (Laughing...not just a small laugh..but a hearty friendly laugh) Please...you are making me Blush
Inner Me: MY GOD..how can someone beautiful like her can get more beautiful...God ain't fair Wyvern
Inner Me: So you are trying to say she is an angel. Well every dog had used that line before. But, considering your background...you did good for a Rookie
Her:(Still laughing) Nooo...definitely not. May be b'cos I got married couple of days back
Inner Me: WHATTTT....what did you just say...machi did I really hear what I just heard. kaduvule...thalai ellam suthuthe. okay...okay. you can mourn this later...people are watching you...first essagu.
Change Song to "silar siripar silar aluvar silar sirithikondei alugindrar"
Me: (Me full of smiles) Oh..really..thats good news. Congratulations.
Inner Me: Sivaji kamal yellam poi periya actor nu solranga...machi unnai mattum ippo Cheran parthan...avanoda aduthu senti padathuku nee than hero
Her: Thanks (still smiling)
Me: Just tell your husband, He is the luckiest man in the world
Inner Me: avan thanni lorri mothi saganum...even better...avan methu oru semi eri kollanum. samayapuram atha...nee matum ithai enaku pannu...unaku gold'le vepa elai seyren)
Her: (smiling...)He already knows that
Inner Me:But he doesn't know about my wish to our powerful samayapuram atha..(Inner me dancing like Vivek...hey ajaku...hey ajaku...hey ajaku)
Me and Inner Me....going out sadly
Song: Sothanai mel sothanai pothumada sami
Me: valkaiyela bulb'u erukalam...ana valkaiye bulb'a irunthuchuna
Inner Me: Machi, nanga appu vangina appu kadavul un kitta varalam...ana appu kadavule appu thanga mudiyama kalangina....nanga yar kittada povom kasmalam
The only good thing about this colossal bulb is that she didn't think I was a psycho. May be a Loser.. I think she realized I was speaking from my heart. But again, who knows for sure what in the hell these girls think. Not me
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Novels that changed me
God Father
Well, everyone knows about this movie. The movie really did justice to the book. I got the book from Raja Rajeswari mall in kovai and started reading at 6 AM next morning. I just wanted to see what the book was about before leaving for college. But, I didn't leave my bed till I finished the book. It was 3:00 PM in the evening. I forgot to brush, coffee, breakfast, lunch and also college.
I was puzzled how my uncle let me stay home and not go to college. That night I got the answer. He told me that after seeing me reading God Father he didn't want to disturb. You have to know my uncle to realize the enormity of this sentence. He is a strict disciplinarian. He also adviced me to remember that god father is just a ficton and not to get into trouble in coming days. I didn't realize what he meant at that time. In the next couple of weeks, unconsciouly, I was trying to emulate Michael Corleone. To cut the story shot, my attempts to emulate God Father resulted in Semester Debar. I was not allowed to attend the 4th Semester. My 4th sem marksheet has 'Absent' next to all courses.
I still dream about being 'Michael Corleone'
To Kill a Mocking Bird
This novel totally changed my views on this world. Its been more than 7 or 8 years since I have read this novel. But I can still feel the impact it made on me. If I can be 10% of Atticus Finch (the novels hero), then I know I have done something worthful with my life.
The novel is told from the view of Atticus daughter, Scout. At one time in the novel, a group red neck American's will surround Atticus and ask him not to interfere with their business with Tom (a black who is being charged with rape - He is the Mocking Bird in this novel). This incident happens in the mid of the night. Atticus children, Scout and Jem, were not supposed to be out there that night. Scout thinks if they are caught they will be grounded. But once Jem(Scout's brother) sees his father in that situation he goes and stands by him. Atticus asks Jem to go home. Jem for the first time in his life disobeys his father and refuses to leave. Scout is worried that her brother might be in big trouble once their father comes home.
Then the villagers leave Atticus alone and they all come home. Scout is expecting her father to reprimand her brother. But instead of grounding Jem, Atticus puts his hand on his sons head and looks at him in a very loving way. Scout being young, can't understand this scene.
But we can understand. Jem, just a small kid, knew his father was in trouble and refuses to leave his side. His act deeply touched his father and thats why he was looking at him that way.
While reading this, I was able to relate to this incident. Me and my father was driving back home from school and we were involved in a very minor accident. There were 4 guys in the other car against my father. Things got heated and I was scared that they might hit my father. So, I took a big rock from the ground and threatened them. I was foul mouthing them. Called them with all bad names I knew. If my mom heard those words, I would have been given for adoption right away. After seeing my craziness, they backed off. After the initial shock, I realised what I have done. Once my father thrashed me with his belt for just using the word 'Mayiru'. Now, I was really scared. All I could think was the feel of my fathers belt. After a couple of minutes, I worked up my confidence and took a peep at my father's face. Thats when I saw him smiling. I know right away things were going to be allright
In my view, Atticus Finch is the perfect Gentleman.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My ideal hero would be a cross between Atticus Finch and Michael Corleone.
Well, everyone knows about this movie. The movie really did justice to the book. I got the book from Raja Rajeswari mall in kovai and started reading at 6 AM next morning. I just wanted to see what the book was about before leaving for college. But, I didn't leave my bed till I finished the book. It was 3:00 PM in the evening. I forgot to brush, coffee, breakfast, lunch and also college.
I was puzzled how my uncle let me stay home and not go to college. That night I got the answer. He told me that after seeing me reading God Father he didn't want to disturb. You have to know my uncle to realize the enormity of this sentence. He is a strict disciplinarian. He also adviced me to remember that god father is just a ficton and not to get into trouble in coming days. I didn't realize what he meant at that time. In the next couple of weeks, unconsciouly, I was trying to emulate Michael Corleone. To cut the story shot, my attempts to emulate God Father resulted in Semester Debar. I was not allowed to attend the 4th Semester. My 4th sem marksheet has 'Absent' next to all courses.
I still dream about being 'Michael Corleone'
To Kill a Mocking Bird
This novel totally changed my views on this world. Its been more than 7 or 8 years since I have read this novel. But I can still feel the impact it made on me. If I can be 10% of Atticus Finch (the novels hero), then I know I have done something worthful with my life.
The novel is told from the view of Atticus daughter, Scout. At one time in the novel, a group red neck American's will surround Atticus and ask him not to interfere with their business with Tom (a black who is being charged with rape - He is the Mocking Bird in this novel). This incident happens in the mid of the night. Atticus children, Scout and Jem, were not supposed to be out there that night. Scout thinks if they are caught they will be grounded. But once Jem(Scout's brother) sees his father in that situation he goes and stands by him. Atticus asks Jem to go home. Jem for the first time in his life disobeys his father and refuses to leave. Scout is worried that her brother might be in big trouble once their father comes home.
Then the villagers leave Atticus alone and they all come home. Scout is expecting her father to reprimand her brother. But instead of grounding Jem, Atticus puts his hand on his sons head and looks at him in a very loving way. Scout being young, can't understand this scene.
But we can understand. Jem, just a small kid, knew his father was in trouble and refuses to leave his side. His act deeply touched his father and thats why he was looking at him that way.
While reading this, I was able to relate to this incident. Me and my father was driving back home from school and we were involved in a very minor accident. There were 4 guys in the other car against my father. Things got heated and I was scared that they might hit my father. So, I took a big rock from the ground and threatened them. I was foul mouthing them. Called them with all bad names I knew. If my mom heard those words, I would have been given for adoption right away. After seeing my craziness, they backed off. After the initial shock, I realised what I have done. Once my father thrashed me with his belt for just using the word 'Mayiru'. Now, I was really scared. All I could think was the feel of my fathers belt. After a couple of minutes, I worked up my confidence and took a peep at my father's face. Thats when I saw him smiling. I know right away things were going to be allright
In my view, Atticus Finch is the perfect Gentleman.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My ideal hero would be a cross between Atticus Finch and Michael Corleone.
Friday, April 13, 2007
My thoughts exactly
Thought 1
I went to mall to spend time and ofcourse to look at all those beautiful girls.
While crossing 'Victoria Secret' store, my legs betrayed and refused to move
Since I was bored to death standing in one place, I started to check out all of Victoria's beautiful posters/wall papers
That's when the thought hit me like a thunderbolt and enlightened me.
It can easily be compared to Moses finding God in bush fire and getting the Ten Commandments.
Thought 2
I was out drinking with my buddies.
Nice atmosphere
DJ rocks...Linkin park is blazing
Dance floor is packed and all those girls are inviting me to dance with them
Even the waitress is giving me the eye
suddenly, Everything changes
DJ sucks...he is playing Back Street Boys
Ladies in the dance floor doesn't even know that a schmuck like me can exist
The waitress is disgusted to even look at me
Then, I look down and find my drink crystal clear like water
Crime: One of my friend is trying to sober me. He is mixing water in my drink
Thought: Punch him in the face. Get a fresh drink. Everything goes back to normal
And thats exactly what I did
Thought 3
Recently saw in TV that Australia is sending '300' soldiers to Afghanistan
What do you think King Leonidas will do
You think he will be rolling in his grave laughing or be impressed
Let me know
P.S: King Leonidas is the famous king portrayed in the Movie '300'
I went to mall to spend time and ofcourse to look at all those beautiful girls.
While crossing 'Victoria Secret' store, my legs betrayed and refused to move
Since I was bored to death standing in one place, I started to check out all of Victoria's beautiful posters/wall papers
That's when the thought hit me like a thunderbolt and enlightened me.
It can easily be compared to Moses finding God in bush fire and getting the Ten Commandments.
"Never say no to your girl friend or wife when they are inside this freaking store"Doesn't matter if you go broke. It's worth it man
Thought 2
I was out drinking with my buddies.
Nice atmosphere
DJ rocks...Linkin park is blazing
Dance floor is packed and all those girls are inviting me to dance with them
Even the waitress is giving me the eye
suddenly, Everything changes
DJ sucks...he is playing Back Street Boys
Ladies in the dance floor doesn't even know that a schmuck like me can exist
The waitress is disgusted to even look at me
Then, I look down and find my drink crystal clear like water
Crime: One of my friend is trying to sober me. He is mixing water in my drink
Thought: Punch him in the face. Get a fresh drink. Everything goes back to normal
And thats exactly what I did
Thought 3
Recently saw in TV that Australia is sending '300' soldiers to Afghanistan
What do you think King Leonidas will do
You think he will be rolling in his grave laughing or be impressed
Let me know
P.S: King Leonidas is the famous king portrayed in the Movie '300'
Friday, March 23, 2007
Rules of Being a Man
International Council of Manhood
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her Blouse.
(b) When your in-laws visit you.
(c) When she is using her teeth.
3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever.
5: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
6: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. If you want to celeberate, you can only celebrate at a strip bar. Period. Issue Closed
7: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach ... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.
8: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.
9: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and make chicken 65's for you
10: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.
11: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
12: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
13: We've all heard about people having guts or balls, but do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below:
"GUTS" is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, "are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"
"BALLS" is calling your wife a fatty
I hope this clears up any confusion,
The International Council of Manhood
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her Blouse.
(b) When your in-laws visit you.
(c) When she is using her teeth.
3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever.
5: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
6: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. If you want to celeberate, you can only celebrate at a strip bar. Period. Issue Closed
7: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach ... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.
8: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.
9: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and make chicken 65's for you
10: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.
11: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
12: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
13: We've all heard about people having guts or balls, but do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below:
"GUTS" is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, "are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"
"BALLS" is calling your wife a fatty
I hope this clears up any confusion,
The International Council of Manhood
Friday, March 09, 2007
How I tracked my Desktop Wallpaper
All of us have seen this beautifull XP wallpaper. But we have no idea where this absolutely blissfull place is. Some guy called Nick Tosches, who had absolutely nothing to do with his life (like me), tracked this place to Canada. It is just west of Toronto in the Burlington suburb of Kilbride. This was news in TheStar. Some canadian news paper/Agency.
Seeing this, I decided to track down my various wall papers. Unfortunately in each case, when I got there all those sexy and sensual women were gone.
But in the process of searching for my wallpaper ladies, I also found the location of another XP wallpaper and how it looks now. Now if y'all will excuse me, I got to get back to my fulltime job of staring at my wallpapers.
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